Categorizing people is a fun exercise. I am not talking about placing people in boxes, clichés, or stereotypes. I am talking about having a system that allows you to assess and match someone’s energy so you can create better communication with them. That’s what all of life is about, hearing others and being heard.
We are focusing on moving beyond the DiSC personality designations. We are going to look at how you can observe someone, watch their movements, and tell where they stand on the DiSC spectrum. This allows you to understand their differences from you so you can then match their gestures, speed, and attitudes. By doing this, you give the other person a sense that you understand them and they feel ‘warm’ toward you.
Have you ever been in a conversation with someone and you hit it off? This is a ‘warm’ conversation. If you were to step back and observe yourself talking with the person you would see that you are matching stances, moving with the same gestures and talking at the same speed and intensity. This mirroring of body language and movement creates trust and greater connection to the other person. We do this subconsciously every day. But what if you could do it (subtlety) so that you build rapport with your co-workers, your boss, and your clients.
Let’s get started. . .
First, we have to know a little about the DiSC ‘circle’. (Imagine a circle.)
If we use this in our minds we can start to break down the components of personality.
Choose a person you see every day. It can be a boss, co-worker, spouse, etc. Ask, “Is this person extroverted or introverted?” The upper portion of the circle are those who are outgoing and are energized by social situations. The lower portion of the circle represents those who are more reserved and like time alone to think and work. You have already eliminated two of the letters just by this observation.
Next, look at how they approach situations and conversations. For the extroverts, is the person more direct or more friendly when they interact. The D’s are your direct communicators and your i’s friendlier. For the introverts, is the person more helpful and accommodating or cautious and analytical. The S’s are your peacemakers and your C’s are your more reserved.
Building trust also includes mirroring gestures. I want to reiterate here that this is not so you match everything in a way that mimics the person. You want to choose indirect ways to match the person’s energy. As you can imagine, a D personality uses lots of expressive non-verbal gestures with their hands and have high energy. An i may also use their hands but it is accompanied with laughter and includes touches and leaning in. An S is also inviting but in a quieter way; movement is slower and more deliberate. A C may be the hardest to read because they virtually have no movement in their interactions; their gestures are also deliberate but also more rigid.
We will address WORDS choices next week for the DiSC personalities. I hope you have gained some insight into creating greater communication through mirroring body language. Check out the Facebook LIVE each day on my personal page as we talk about the way each personality dresses and have some fun with role playing exercises.
Be filled to overflowing,